You have worked and worked, you push yourself to the ends, and make every sacrifice possible and put every last resource you have on the table, but at the end of the day, I am realizing, there is just only so much you can do. Sometimes your best is not for everyone…
I want you to take to heart that at the end of the day if you gave it your best it is time to relax and let it go. Yes, much easier said than done as I myself am still struggling with this on a more regular basis than I care to admit. We are only human and being able to recharge our spirits is of vital importance to not only our well-being but also our success levels. This I know for a fact; I am better when after honestly giving it my all to allow time to enjoy what was accomplished as well as giving myself some quality personal time off from responsibilities demands.
Believe with your whole being that while we strive to offer the best services followed up by exemplary customer care that our best is not for everyone. And, that is okay. There are literally thousands of people that need you and will be appreciative of what you bring to the table. These people will be the ones that meet you in the middle by acknowledging and referring their connections to you. If you are struggling to help someone with your services and they are not willing or able to provide you with what you need to bring a successful conclusion to the task at hand I want, you to give yourself permission to let go.
You know those I am talking about; you offer what is best because it is what you have trained for, soaked up education on and cultivated skills around and they hire you but then do not listen to your wisdom. Then after not listening they are dismayed at the results wanting you to fix it. This happens all the time and for some of us we push ourselves harder because we want to help them all and can see the big picture. The saying you can lead them to success but cannot force them to succeed comes to mind when trying to help someone that is not truly open to being helped.
I have been thinking about this a lot lately, feeling this underlying tension because I want to inspire people to be as great as I see them being, and want to give them the tools to go make their dreams come true. But, we cannot make others benefit from our value we can only offer our best and accept that fact that our best is not for everyone…
I want you to hear and say it out loud; you that you have what it takes, that you are talented, amazing, important and you very much matter (no matter how many people do not see all the little things you do when they are not looking – which by the way is most of the time). This is not a derogatory remark it is a fact all people who hire us to do something for them is because nine times out of ten they do not have the time to do it themselves. So it goes without saying if they do not have the time to do it they probably do not have the time to notice your extra efforts on their behalf.
You could toot your own horn but I have found that if you have to do that once you will always have to do it with that particular connection. In the end, the acknowledgment will be unrewarding because it was forced. Do your best, keep adding extra value and those that deserve your awesomeness will find you. Over two-thirds of my connections take the time to see and acknowledge the effort my company puts forth on their behalf always looking for more we can do. When I ask for something that will improve the value of what I am doing they make sure I receive it promptly because they know I am working hard for their benefit. Those are the ones that we hold dear because they make our hard work all worth it.
But, let us talk for a moment about the one-third of our connections that continually ask for more while not noticing or caring to acknowledge all the extra benefits done on their behalf. We do not do it for the acknowledgment as it is our job and hopefully, we love our job but it is grand when they ‘see’.
But lately I’ve been wondering if I need to say this, too: There is only so much you can do.
I feel like I need to be reminded that it is okay. I am more than okay. Not everything is up to me. Working hard is good and rewarding. But the whole world does not rest on my shoulders. There is just only so much you can do and only so much others will allow you to do. So I thought well if I need to hear it maybe others do too?
Do you know what scares me most about chasing what really matters to me —
At the end of the day, I can give it all I have, and then still think what if it was not enough? I wonder if this is why so many of us hold back, like I did for so many years, accepting less than what we know we have to give. I wonder if it makes us feel better, to keep our world’s small and manageable, so we can have control over them. So we do not open ourselves to those that do not – cannot see?
But now that I have stepped out of my tiny world into something bigger and better — something that is far too big for me to handle on my own — I can say from experience: It is scary and at the same time wonderful out here. I do not have control and it is okay.
It is too big for me. And that is a good thing it makes me feel alive and challenged. All I can give is everything I have. All you can give is everything you have. It just might be more than you think it is. I am enough. You are enough. But, that still does not mean our best is for everyone…
When it comes to providing a service, offering a product, learning something new, challenging your kids, starting a new business, being the “perfect” mom/dad or wife/husband or daughter/son or friend…
There is really only so much you can do because remember your best is not for everyone and at the end of the day that is still okay because you gave it your all and for the ones that matter that is more than enough. ~K. Kirkland